Knowing When to Get Help

December 8, 2011 at 3:33 pm | Posted in health, self development/motivation | Leave a comment
Tags: , , ,

Can you help me?

As a counsellor, coach or other therapist we are not exempt from needing help. We all do face life issues that we cannot easily deal with ourselves and need an outside expert to support us. Even though we work in the field of supporting people it does not mean we can easily fix all our own problems.

Like any doctor who at times needs to see a colleague, so do counsellors. But when is it the right time? This is the exact same question that you will be asking yourself, before calling and making an appointment with a counsellor. Let me share you my experience in making the decision to make the call.

With the recent challenges I experienced with the passing of one of my twins two days after she was born I was facing the hardest times I ever had to go through in my life. The grief on one side and the joy of new motherhood on the other side, including the sleep deprivation and learning how to be a parent put me under big strain, emotionally, mentally and physically. Even though I was coping most of the times, there were times when I was not. In the good times I would think ‘it is fine, I’m able to do this on my own’ but in the tough times I really wasn’t all that fine – understandable under the circumstances.

There came the time that the tough times were too frequent and unsustainable over time. My life normally was built on the base of good times with sprinkles of challenges and annoyances. The life that I was living now however was the opposite; it was as if tough times were the undercurrent of my life.

If you were to compare your ‘normal life’ with how you are now, how different is it? Can you really live with how it is now? Is it just an exception or is it a trend? Answering these questions made me seek help.

I do not expect the person I am seeing to solve my problems or fix my issues. Some of the things that I am dealing with cannot be solved ever. That is not the point of seeing someone. She helps me deal with the challenges I am facing, she supports me in gaining a different perspective and think about upcoming potential pitfalls before I fall in again. And the most important benefit I get from the sessions is that she normalizes my situation, my emotions, and my reactions. She makes me feel normal, where I am an expert in being hard on myself. She does not make my life easy but she definitely helps to ease and softens my tough side or challenges my judgmental side.

All in all I would say that if you are asking yourself the question whether it is time to ask for help, do it. If you were in victim mentality, you probably would not ask the question anyway…

The Difference Between Counselling and Coaching

August 4, 2010 at 5:06 pm | Posted in self development/motivation | Leave a comment
Tags: ,

Many people ask me this question – so I’ve written an article/blog post about it. Please feel free to leave your comments!

Nowadays most people take the advantage of supporting themselves with the help of a counsellor, coach or therapist through the challenges life throws at them at some stage. For people new to the field of self-development the question ‘What is the difference between a counsellor and coach?’ comes up often. Lets find some distinctions that might be helpful to you.

Supporting people to be the very best

Counselling

Counselling is the modality to heal yourself, to find closure for things that happened in your past, to come to see things from a healthier perspective, to learn to let go of grudges and resentment and to build up ego strength. Counselling often works as a ‘talking therapy’ as research has found that expressing emotions helps to digest them. A counsellor acts as a professional friend in whom you can confide your innermost thoughts. They will listen attentively and hold no judgment over your opinions or ideas. Most counsellors will refrain from giving you advice but help you find your own way, clarify the issues, bring understanding and wider perspective and support you in making your own wise decisions. Counselling mostly focuses on clearing past issues.

Coaching

Coaching is the modality to go forward, to plan for Continue Reading The Difference Between Counselling and Coaching…

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.
Entries and comments feeds.